Living the Sabbath Rest

Everyone has been asking us if we've found a new house to move into yet and my answer is still, "We haven't gotten the final word yet, but God's got this!"

I recently finished reading Genesis and felt prompted to start digging into Hebrews, the book of faith. This morning, I read chapter 3, which oddly enough happened to be all about houses at the start of the chapter, and then continued on into chapter 4, which talks a lot about entering into His rest and mentioned the Sabbath. After reading that chapter, I happened to check my FaceBook and had my memories from this day over the last several years show up in my notifications. Guess what was one of my memories from this day last year??? A post about me actually taking a Sabbath day of rest with my family.

God had my attention.

People haven't understood how we could wait patiently and not be freaking out about not having a solid answer on a house that we're hoping to move into in 4 days, but we know that God's got this. We don't have a Plan B. I know that sounds totally crazy, but God has confirmed in a really unique way that this is the house, so we're waiting on Him. We know that He'll make all the pieces fall into place and the timing will be perfect. If we've somehow missed it, then we've missed it and we'll cross that bridge if we get to it.

In the meantime, our plan is to hold steadfast to the end, believing in the One who built the house in the first place and we're giving Him all of the glory along the way (Heb. 3: 3-6, 14). We're determined to remain steadfast in our hearts and in doing so, we know that we'll enter His rest - the very opposite of the Israelites who wandered in the desert for 40 years and were denied entrance into the Promised Land, the land of rest, because their hearts were hardened, they tested and tried God, and they went astray in their hearts despite having seen God move miraculously in their midst (vs. 8-11). We've seen God move miraculously in so many ways and because of that, we have steadfast faith that He'll do it again.

We're planning on enjoying entering His rest because "we who have believed do enter that rest" (Heb. 4: 3).

Are you finding rest in Him? It's yours for the taking. Believe, have faith, hold steadfast in your confidence in Him to the end and enter His rest.

The Renovated Life: Arise Life Church

What an incredible honor and blessing it was to share a bit of our story and God's renovating work in our lives at Arise Life last night!

We're making the message available in two formats - a live video posted on our FaceBook page, as well as a link to the podcast. If you're on FaceBook, you should be able to access the video since we made it "public."

If you have trouble accessing the message in these formats, but would still like to listen, please get in touch and we'll do our best to help!

The Renovated Life FaceBook Live Video

Arise Life Podcast

Join Us This Saturday at Arise Life!

You've read our blog...if you'd like to hear us speak in person about living a Renovated Life, join us this Saturday, July 9th, at 6:00 p.m. at Arise Life Church, 2005 Stilesboro Rd., Kennesaw, GA. (Click on the address for a link to directions.)

We'd love to have you join us!

God's Got This

As I began reading the first verses in Genesis 16 this morning, I felt compelled to stop and journal. This is what I wrote.

“Lord, I understand Sarai well. She believed Your promise, but when that promise was delayed, she came up with a solution that she thought would bring Your promise to fruition. How often do I see or understand your plan, then come up with my own solution for seeing it fulfilled? The waiting can be so hard. I begin to second-guess myself and think that I should be doing more – taking more steps of faith, putting more into action. You are perfectly capable of fulfilling Your promises without my help. I know there’s a part for me to play – even Sarai had to be intimate with Abram for Isaac to be conceived, but You don’t need me to come up with my own way of bringing Your promises to pass. You keep telling me that You’ve got this, so I’m going to do what I’m supposed to do and let You do the rest.”

In so many ways, we’re waiting on Your promises to be fulfilled right now, but we’re not alone in this. So many others whom we know and love are in similar positions and, like us, they have huge life changes on the horizon. In the process of our lives being renovated, which sometimes includes being moved to an entirely new house and location, the uncertainty and the inability to see the end from the beginning can be incredibly disconcerting. What we do know is that You’ve given us promises and You have a solid track record of fulfilling those in our lives. So, we’ll continue to stand on the words that keep echoing through our minds, “God’s got this.”

Worth the Investment

Marriage is hard.

You live with someone day in and day out. Their idiosyncrasies may or may not drive you crazy and it's easy to get so wrapped up in the day-to-day that you can pause and suddenly realize your spouse has become your roommate, not your best friend and lover. What about the baggage you brought into your marriage and let's not forget the unexpected turns of events - the business failures, illnesses, the "life didn't turn out the way I thought it would" events and even tragedies? Yah, none of that is easy.

Brian and I were watching a Hallmark movie last night (yes, we do that and Bri actually enjoys them). It was Karen Kingsbury’s “A Time to Dance.” A couple married for over 20 years was about to divorce when they discovered that their daughter was engaged and they decided to hide their decision until after her wedding. At one point in the movie, the father-in-law was speaking to his son-in-law and explained him that a marriage is like a house that’s been invested in – you don’t just throw away the investment. You take care of it, make the repairs, and treat it like the investment that it is. (Sound familiar? Renovated Life, anyone???)

It’s funny the things that will spark conversation. Bri and I talked for a while after that movie, reflecting on the countless times that we’ve purposely CHOSEN one another, even telling the other one, “I choose YOU.” I’ve struggled at times with feeling like I wasn’t “enough” for Bri – not the right shape or size, not giving enough of myself often enough intimately, not being adventurous enough, or supportive enough of his dreams…He could say the same of himself toward me as far as not feeling like he’s been “enough,” but that’s his story to write and not mine.

We have an amazing marriage and we don’t ever take it for granted. We know ours isn’t the “norm” – it’s unique, it’s us and it’s been hard fought for and hard won. It’s a choice we make every day. We choose not to settle for less. We choose to work through the frustrations. We choose to be angry, but not tear the other person down in the process. We’ve never called one another a derogatory name – EVER. We choose to believe the best in the other person, knowing the heart above what we are seeing and hearing in the moment.

We live by 3 rules in marriage and those 3 rules have saved us time and again:

1. Jesus Christ is Lord of our lives (and our FIRST LOVE, above the other person).
2. Divorce is not an option (Oh, but I have such great compassion and empathy for those who have divorced. I looked at a church leader years ago and said, “I totally understand why people choose to get a divorce because it can seem a whole lot easier than what we’re going through right now.” I can tell you, however, that being on the other side of that rough time and having fought through it has made our marriage so very sweet…)
3. When angry, deal with the issue, don’t assassinate the other person’s character (i.e. no name calling).

 Some people get angry with us for the things we share publicly about one another. It’s “TMI” in their opinion and spoken of too often. That’s ok. Each person is entitled to their opinion and it’s not going to change anything for us. I’m here to tell you that while what we have in our relationship is rare and beautiful, it’s something that ANYONE can have. How badly do you want it? What are you doing to care for your investment? Are you making the repairs? Are you taking care of it? Are you putting the other person before yourself? Are you communicating even when it’s hard, facing challenges with love and offering grace in areas where you’re each missing it? Are you forgiving even when you feel you have every right to hold something against your spouse? (***)

What do you want in your marriage? What kind of a vision do you have for it? What have you dreamed your marriage would be like? When is the last time you saw your marriage being able to be like that or a “Jesus refined” version of it (since we can sometimes get a bit selfishly off track in our dreams)? Can you believe that He can redeem it and make it even better than what you’ve imagined or hoped for? Are you willing to put in the work…make the sacrifices…lay down your life for one another? Do you really want it and can you commit to walking it out EVERY. SINGLE. DAY?

It’s work. Think of the homes that have good bones, but need to be totally gutted and redone to make them beautiful and inhabitable again. Those homes can sometimes be purchased for as little as a dollar, but when the work is completed, they’re worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in return. Yes, a cost is paid to get them in that condition, but their value exceeds the cost spent, giving it a good ROI – return on investment, and making it well worth the frustrations, obstacles, unexpected expenses and even the delays in completion.

In the end, it’s beautiful and priceless, a treasure for the two of you and for the generations that follow in your family line. What an inheritance to pass on to your children, grandchildren, great grandchildren…and it can all begin with you.

My love, I choose YOU. 

  

(***Side note – we fully believe that there are situations and circumstances in which for the health, safety, and well-being of a spouse or children in the home that separation and even divorce needs to happen. We don’t believe that marriage should be maintained at the price of abuse. That being said, we do believe that God is the God of the impossible and He is a redemptive God. Use wisdom.)

Vantage Point

When I think about building a house, one of the first things that comes to my mind is the view. How will the house be positioned and what will I see out of each window in the house? I want to position it to make the most of its vantage point, affording me the best view possible no matter where I am in the home.

I’ve been thinking about vantage points in terms of people recently. God keeps drawing me to have a deeper understanding of His vantage point when He looks at people. Vantage point literally means, “a place or position affording a good view of something.” His view is so much different from mine. He sees us with such deep love. He looks past our flaws and He sees us as we were created to be, according to His original design for us. Through His unconditional love, He draws that original plan out from within us, bringing us into the fullness of our unique design. We have a choice to respond or not, remaining the same or allowing that love to change our hearts, transforming us from the inside out.

When I look at others, do I see a “good view” of them? Can I look past that which is unlovely in them? Can I look past it in myself?

Jesus hung out with sinners, tax collectors, and prostitutes. It was on these men and women that the church was built, but today, how many of us shun those we’ve determined to be sinners, especially when it comes to building the church? When is the last time any of us have loved the “objectionable” individuals in our midst. Can we see a leader within them? Can we look at an addict and see redemptively into their lives and souls, look beyond their current circumstances and see the greatness of His testimony within  them waiting to be drawn out? How is our house positioned? What do we see out of each window?

We’re called to love – even those…ESPECIALLY those…who don’t deserve it. The homeless, the addict, the prostitute, the pimp, the adulterer, the thief. Think of it… with one of His final breaths, Jesus loved the thief hanging beside Him and assured him of his place with Jesus in eternity.

Do we have that vantage point? I’m not there yet, but I’m working on it.

Dismantling

Have you ever built something really great, then found that it needed to be dismantled and rebuilt? Friends of ours are finding themselves in that position, having built a beautiful, new garage that now has to be partially torn down and rebuilt differently on their property in order for it to align with the city ordinances.  Talk about frustrating and stressful!

Personally, I’ve discovered a number of things in my life, especially in my thinking, that I had thought to be good at the time, but have found needed to be dismantled and rebuilt on a foundation of truth. Brian and I are two of the church’s walking wounded – or at least we were. It’s heartbreaking to see and experience the devastation of lives that can happen through the hands of believers, most of whom truly believe that they’re following God in the process. How do I know that? I was one of those people, controlling others all in the name of Jesus and my pursuit of following and honoring Him by following and honoring man. Ahhh…understanding dawns and truth illuminates…I had become more enveloped in the fear of man than I had in the fear of God. I wanted and needed affirmation so badly that I blindly followed believing that in following the man and woman of God, I was hearing from God Himself and doing His will.

I’ve spent the last 10 years going through a process of being lovingly dismantled, then rebuilt on a true foundation, one built on Him without a middleman between He and I. In the process, I’ve apologized and asked forgiveness of any number of people – people whom I’ve loved with all of my heart and poured into as a misguided leader and minister of the Gospel. Despite me, God is faithful. He is loving. He is forgiving. He is GOOD – so much more so than I ever knew Him to be in the past.

He’s torn down what I knew to be the definition of covenant relationship, what it means to minister in His name, what it’s really like to love as He loves, especially the unlovely – those who are “undeserving,” who don’t “measure up.” He’s opened my eyes to see beyond the present and into the heart – not the heart of the person, but the heart of the Father who loves so deeply and sees each of us as the adored sons and daughters whom He has created with divine purpose and eternal destiny.

Maybe most of all, He has dismantled the “have to’s” of religion and ministry, given me a voice that speaks boundaries, and transformed blind obedience into a love relationship where my response to Him is one of passion and desire to follow His leading. He’s been pulling down the need for man’s approval and been instilling a deep contentment with His pleasure and favor, giving me a sense of being fulfilled in a way that man could never accomplish. The desire to be in His presence, soaking up His adoration rather than man’s accolades is becoming more and more important to me with each passing day. Just to hear His voice and KNOW that He’s spoken to me…words fail me in trying to describe how it makes me feel.

Worship has become something even deeper than it ever was because of the depths of His heart that He enables me to touch as I pour out my adoration and revel in the nearness of His presence. He is my everything and it’s so much more than I ever realized it could be because He’s so much more loving than I had ever known Him to be. He’s not a task master. He’s the lover of my soul. He invites me to participate with Him in the things that are the passions of His heart. He’s teaching me to love in a more pure way, without expectation of return or performance, just love for the sake of love.

Having a greater understanding of His goodness has brought freedom to my soul. It’s made me brave and courageous, far beyond my capabilities. Even though the dismantling process has been painful at times, His love and goodness have been at the root of it all and the knowledge of the depth of His love has made me brave enough to continue to walk through it.

If you are one whom I hurt in the past, I’m so very sorry. Please forgive me. I love you deeply and God loves you so much more. If you have been hurt by others in the church, rejected in any way, I’m so very sorry for that, too. Please forgive them and find freedom in that forgiveness. My prayer is that Father God would dismantle the lies that we’ve believed to be truth and that His love and goodness would ignite a deep healing in each of our hearts. I pray “you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32)   

The Field

This is a complete departure from the way I normally write, but this is what was on my heart today. I hope that through it, you'll find yourself caught up in His arms of love...

In a field was a girl, walking through the tall grasses, clothed in a flowing white dress, fingers brushing the tips of each blade of grass in her path.

She knew He was there. Heart filled with expectancy and anticipation, she looked for Him. The sun shone down brilliantly all around, warming her face and adding to her joy. “He’s here…I know He’s here…”

Peace filled her soul with each step she took. A light breeze caught her hair, wrapping it around her face, and she laughed in delight.

A large tree stood in the distance, a majestic sentinel keeping watch over the meadow. There He stood next to it, watching her approach, utter delight upon His face.

Catching sight of Him, she hiked up her skirt, running to Him as swiftly as her bare feet would carry her. In a burst of love-filled speed, He had her caught up in His arms, swinging her around, squeals of laughter and deep rumbles of joy filling the air.

Lifting her into His arms, He carried her to the tree where He sat down, back against its trunk, cradling her close to His heart, her head resting against His chest. She breathed deeply of His fragrance and listened to the beating of His heart as He gently stroked her hair. All she could think was that here, in His arms, she was home; she was safe, protected, and loved.

Then, the realization hit her and she sat up, looking over His shoulder. The tree upon which the One whom she loved leaned was a purposeful reminder of the tree, in the form of a cross, which had brought them together, making it possible for them to revel in the fullness of their love relationship. She was reminded anew of just how deeply He loved her and how sacrificial that love really was. He not only waited for her as she searched for Him, He had prepared the way, making the path open for her to come to Him through His own sacrifice.

She leaned back against Him, overwhelmed by the depth of His love. She felt His arms wrap around her even more tightly and knew that He was responding to her thoughts. 

“I am Yours and You are mine for all eternity…”

Blossoms

I love when spring comes and fills the trees with colors of white, light pink, purple, yellow and fuschia. I look out my office window at home and see blossoms everywhere. It’s as if everything on the earth has awakened and new life has come after months of grays and browns had swallowed up nature’s vibrancy.  

I can’t help but think of the ways that the very same thing has been happening in the lives of so many around us. I’ve watched as friends whom we love and care about deeply have come through challenging times and been transformed through their winter season, having now entered into their spring. Winter been harsher for some, while it’s been milder for others. One friend called this morning just to say that after all she’s walked through, she’s never been happier in her life or closer to Jesus. Other sweet friends, whose life looked very different just two years ago, are moving across the nation to live in a place where they’ll be fulfilling dreams that have only been dreams…until now. They’re each blossoming in their own ways and there’s such beauty in it.

What’s always fascinated me is that the blossoms I love so much can’t burst forth unless death has come first.  I’m particularly mindful of that right now since it’s Holy Week – the week we remember the greatest sacrifice ever made and the Resurrection that overcame Death once and for all. There’s an oft-told legend of the Dogwood tree in which it’s been said that it used to be a very large tree and its wood was chosen for use as the cross Christ carried. It was so sorrowed by its use that Christ took pity on its suffering and said that it would no longer grow large enough for its wood to be used for such a purpose. Its blossoms would be in the shape of a cross with brown and red marks for the rust of the nails and blood of Jesus and in the center of the blossom, there would sit a crown of thorns. Whether this legend holds any truth really doesn’t matter. The Dogwood outside my window still draws my heart close to my Savior through its blossoms.  

The blossoms I see all around me give me hope and fill my heart with anticipation. I know that no matter how long the winter may be, spring will come and new life will burst forth. It’s impossible for the season of death and desolation to last forever. Even in those dreary months when darkness seems pervasive and never-ending, joy can be found. I think of the fun of sledding, being curled up by the fire, playing games with our family, snuggling together and watching movies, and celebrating Christmas, which is my favorite time of the year even though it falls during the winter season. Even during those months that can seem so bleak, we can find joy, wonder and love.

Our winter seasons don’t generally coincide with nature, but each time a season changes on earth, I’m mindful that the seasons of my life will change, too. Even though the winter months of our lives may seem to be lasting longer than they should with Punxsutawney Phil declaring that we’re in store for another 6 weeks of it, the seasons of our lives will change. We’ll blossom and grow. There will be new life and those around us may even marvel at the beauty of it.

Playing in the Rain

I still remember when I got in trouble for playing out in the rain. I was only 9 or 10 and couldn’t figure out why it was such a problem. I was wet, but we weren’t even going anywhere. All these years later, I still love playing in the rain. I let our kids dance and play in it when they were little and joined them, dancing along beside them as the rain splashed the earth. We would come inside soaking wet and laughing; oftentimes, they didn’t even have any clothes on. When we first moved to Georgia and Bri was still in Connecticut finishing up a job he was working on, he would come and visit us some weekends. One weekend, we were out running errands together and stopped at a Starbucks for a cup of coffee. The skies had opened up and bucketfuls of water were pouring down. We splashed in the puddles, kicked water at each other, laughed and kissed as the rain fell on our faces. That will forever be known as “our” Starbucks…

There’s something about the rain…the way it washes over us, splatters on our faces, sometimes falling on our smiles, at other times, mixing with our tears.  It’s cleansing, refreshing, at times scary and overpowering, leaving us feeling exposed and unsafe, at other times making us feel secure as we sit cozied up inside, blankets wrapped around us, with rain pelting the windows.

I think part of the reason why I love rain so much – its feel, its smell – is because of its touch upon my spirit and soul and the way that it’s inextricably connected to Holy Spirit. I see Him and sense Him in the rain and I sense the Father’s delight at my play and His laughter at my antics. I feel Holy Spirit wash over me, splattering me with His very being. It can feel overpowering and even a bit scary at times, but it makes me think of C.S. Lewis’ (1950) The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe when Susan asks if the great Lion, Aslan, is safe. "Safe?" said Mr. Beaver. "Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you.”

I feel the same way about Holy Spirit. My life with Him is anything but “safe,” sometimes leaving me feeling exposed, but He’s good and there is no adventure like the one I’m on with Him. More often than not, He wraps me up in His presence, making me feel loved, secure, safe, at home, and even empowered. At other times, He washes over my broken, battered and tattered self, cleansing my wounds, His water mixing with my tears and washing them away.

I’m much more apt to play in the rain when my hair is curly. I don’t worry about messing up a hairstyle that I’d spent time straightening. When my hair is curly, I’m unencumbered, without any worries about how the rain will “mess things up.” I’m much more willing to get messy when I haven’t invested the time into trying to get things perfect. My husband will be the first to say that I’m the most beautiful in those moments when I’m drenched and imperfect, a smile filling my face. It’s the same with Holy Spirit. Being willing to freely soak in His presence, unencumbered by perfection, drenched in His love, causing a smile to well up from within and pour out…it’s beautiful. Sometimes we get so entrenched in needing things to be a certain way because we’ve worked hard for them to be a certain way that we stay out of the rain altogether, when what would bring us true joy is to go out and play, get messy, laugh, and smile.

I feel it in my bones, You’re about to move

I feel it in the wind, You’re about to ride in

You said that You would pour Your Spirit out

You said that You would fall on sons and daughters

So let the rain drench us in love

Let Your power rush in like a flood

(Spirit Move, Bethel Music, 2015)

Let the rain pour down, soaking you. Let it wash over you, love its feel and its smell…Be imperfect, without worries about how you look. Be a beautiful mess. Dance and play. Be free.

Lewis, C.S. (1950). The lion, the witch, and the wardrobe. Macmillan, NY.

When the Dog Bites

A few days ago, I was out walking and long story short, got bitten in the leg by a dog. Of course, I had stopped carrying my pepper spray, thinking I really didn’t need it. How wrong I was! While the bite had broken the skin and left some bruising, it fortunately wasn’t serious. What affected me more was how frightening the situation had been for me, especially since the dog continued to follow me across the road to a neighbor’s house where I took refuge.  For the rest of the night, each time I had to share the story with someone, I began to shake. The incident was so unexpected, my leg hurt like crazy, and I felt a measure of trauma from it. I crawled into bed after taking a hot shower, drank a cup of tea, used essential oils to help foster a sense of peace and calm within me and had my husband hold me. I just wanted all to be right with my world again.

There was one point in the evening when Bri asked me if I had talked to Jesus about what had happened. I was NOT in a frame of mind to have a conversation yet. I didn’t even feel like I could think straight at that point! Then, the next morning I went to church and a friend who had seen my post about having been bitten asked if I was ok and followed that with, “Have you talked to God about this yet?” Point taken, Jesus, hint received…So, I had a conversation with Him. It didn’t take long and it was quite simple. It went something like this:

Me: Lord, I know you didn’t cause that dog to bite me, but what do you want me to take away from this having happened?

God: Fear has entered into your life. The snarling dog and his pursuit of you, even across a busy road, represent fear’s pursuit of you.

That gave me a lot to think about and I knew I was given a choice in that moment – continue on in fear or make the choice to not let fear dominate me. I thought about all of the things that I struggle with that cause fear. It’s primarily centered on security and having the finances to meet even our most basic needs. When those needs aren’t met, I become incredibly fearful and the dog is biting at my leg.

I thought about being in that situation with the dog aggressively coming toward me. I relied on what I knew to do in my own strength and power – I didn’t run and I used a very deep, loud voice to declare, “NO!” The problem was that what I did in my own strength and power wasn’t enough. The dog got his bite in and continued to pursue me, causing fear to keep me behind a closed door that I wouldn’t come out from behind until two other men went outside to check for the dog and my husband was on his way to “rescue” me. It never occurred to me in the midst of the situation to cry out to God for help or to use the name of Jesus with power and authority. I automatically fell back on what I knew to do on my own to help myself in a scary situation. I didn’t beat myself up over that, but it did make me think of how often I do that in any variety of situations.

When we find ourselves in need with our backs up against a wall, we pray and cry out to God for help, but we often default to doing all that we can in our own strength to save ourselves, coming up with solutions that may not always be HIS solutions. We react out of fear, making a swift decision and jumping at the most immediate way out when traveling that way can lead us on a much longer path to being saved from the very thing that’s causing us to fear. It reminds me of the Israelites who wandered in the desert for 40 years because they let fear dominate the majority and an entire generation never entered the Promised Land. They missed out on so much, including the miracles that God performed on their behalf when they eventually faced their enemies in the land God had given them. He did so much more on their behalf than they ever could have done for themselves. Just think of the walls of Jericho!

The passage in Matthew 6: 25-34 comes to mind. Jesus ends by saying, “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’…For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own troubles.”  Even knowing this, how many of us fear and worry about both the big and the small? Much of what we worry about is completely out of our control, which is why we fear it.

When Todd White spoke at our church the morning after I was bitten, he shared a word picture of holding a daisy and pulling off each petal one-by-one, saying of the Father, “He loves me. He loves me. He loves me…” There’s never a “not” attached to that when you’re thinking of how the Father loves each of us. Being sure of that beyond a shadow of a doubt keeps fear at bay, closing the door in its face, and gives us authority over it so that it has no longer has power over us. I KNOW that we have a Father in heaven who adores us and cares for our every need and I KNOW He WILL stand by His word because He is faithful.   Because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He is a good, good Father, I don’t need to be afraid. I can trust, even when things look scary.

While the dogs may pursue and nip at us, we can be assured that even in those situations, He IS protecting us and He does a much better job of it than we can do for ourselves. The choice is ours. Are we going to continue on in fear or choose to not let fear dominate us? My decision is made. How about you?

Boundaries

As I was reading in Joshua this morning, I was struck by a long, detailed list of the borders of the land allotted to Judah. I’ve got to be honest; I was bored. It was only twelve verses; however, I couldn’t help but wonder why on earth God thought these details were important enough to include them in the Bible because when I read them, they have no meaning to me since none of the places listed are familiar to me. I can appreciate the historical factor of having it included, but it prompted me to ask God why borders are so important to Him. Within me, I immediately heard, “They create boundaries.”

Hmmmm…that made me wonder why boundaries are so important, which in my mind automatically linked together both physical boundaries and emotional boundaries when I began to consider their importance.

The list I created was this:

• Boundaries provide safety, keeping those things in that should stay in and keeping those things out that are potentially harmful.
• Boundaries create a sense of ownership.
• Boundaries provide a record for future generations to know the history of the area – both what has been conquered and what has been taken.
• When there are boundaries, it provides an understanding for people to know where they belong and also to Whom they belong.
• Boundaries also keep things out that we’re not meant to have dwell among us because those things draw us away from God and His plans for our lives.

So, how does this apply to living a renovated life? In all kinds of ways! More than one book has been written on the topic of establishing healthy boundaries in our lives. I’m not going to try to rewrite what has already been said so well. Put quite simply, boundaries establish a line that we either allow others to cross or we don’t, and there are those for whom we need to have very strong boundaries in place for our mental health and overall well-being. That may mean that we keep them physically out of our lives or, if there is reason for them to remain in our lives, we set up clear limitations of what is allowed, even in the ways in which we’re spoken to, and what isn’t permitted, standing our ground to keep those boundaries in place.

When we set boundaries, we take ownership over that area. We have a sense that it’s ours to tend, keep, nurture and cause to thrive. We know what’s ours and we take care of it. Future generations also know our history as we pass it down through storytelling, written records of marriages, births, home leases and ownership, journals and more. Generations can know what we’ve conquered, where we’ve failed  and also the ground we’ve laid claim to as our own, leaving it as a legacy to their generation and beyond.

Boundaries can create a sense of family, community, tribe and culture. They can be found in any setting and they can be healthy or not. For instance, our past includes being a part of a church culture that became incredibly unhealthy and it took us years to heal from it. Our journey out of it has included setting up boundaries that now also consist of not only being able to identify when things are “off,” but in being able to say no to following a leader when that’s the best decision for us to make.  It’s founded on knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt to Whom we belong and Whose leading we follow.

I think what struck me most in my reading this morning were the notes I read about those whom the Israelites didn’t quite drive out from their midst. Two of the places were in Joshua 15:63 and 16:10, but those certainly aren’t the only places where this idea is mentioned. The notes in my Spirit Filled Life Bible talk about how Israel’s failure to fully drive out the foreigners in their land would affect “the moral and social fiber of their lives for generations” and how it would also “eventually turn the Israelites from following God” (p. 328). I know that I can look back at times when I’ve allowed relationships to become a part of my life, both as friends and as love interests, and those individuals have drawn me away from my relationship with my First Love. If not for His grace, my life would have been train wrecked more than once, most especially when I was engaged at 19 to an abusive alcoholic, all the while professing my faith in Christ, yet not honoring Him with my body or my actions.

I wasn’t following God during those times, but God still pursued me, much as He illustrated through the life of Hosea and his marriage to Gomer. God continued to love me, just as He continued to love Israel despite the multitudes of times they turned away from Him. He restored me and when I read words like these, I see myself in them, “For you have stumbled because of your iniquity (sin); take words with you, and return to the Lord. Say to Him, ‘Take away all iniquity; receive us (me) graciously.’”…To which He responds, “’I will heal their backsliding, I will love them freely’” (Hosea 14:1-2, 4, words in parentheses added).

I have enough strong will in me to sometimes fight against things that I may feel have been imposed on me, but I’ve learned that boundaries aren’t for hemming in unnecessarily, imprisoning those within. Instead, they’re a protection, a means of keeping those things out that aren’t meant to come in and keeping within those things that are meant to remain. They create a sense of identity and ownership and within that dual plan, we can know to Whom we belong. We can also know that when we’ve strayed outside of our borders and stumbled, we can return, experience healing and know that we are loved.

Spirit Filled Life Bible (2013), New King James Version, Thomas Nelson Publishing.

Choices

Have you ever decided to paint a room, knew what color you wanted, went to the store to get your paint, then stood before the vast selection of shades in your chosen color and been completely at a loss as to which to select? Frustrating, right? You went into the store thinking you knew exactly what you wanted and came out with a variety of color samples to try on your walls before committing to a decision. One moment you were confident and certain and the next, you were confused and unable to complete your task. Alternatively, maybe you simply wanted to save time and get it done, so you grabbed a color you thought would be right, then got it on your walls and decided you couldn’t stand the choice you made.

How many times do we face that same uncertainty or even the repercussions of impulsive decisions made in our own lives? We head in a direction that seems certain only to find that making our decisions isn’t as easy as we’d thought it would be and we’re left frustrated by not being able to move forward as planned. We may then act on impulse and make a choice that ends up not being what we’d really wanted.  Sometimes, there are simply too many options. Any one of them would be good choices, but we’re left wondering which one is BEST?

Unlike the animals, we were created with a free will – the ability to choose. While there’s great freedom in that, tremendous responsibility comes along with that freedom. Our choices often affect those around us. This knowledge can be a catalyst for positive action or cause paralysis.

Recently, I’ve become very aware of my choices, especially in the area of how I’m feeling at a particular moment and how I’m responding to others. I’ve had opportunities to recognize that I could either be angry, frustrated or discouraged or I could choose joy instead. While this isn’t revelatory, it’s been freeing to remember that I really do have the power to choose and to set the course of the rest of my day based on that choice.

Whether I’ve been “set off” by my son’s bad mood, a decision made at my other son’s school, or poor communication between myself and another, I get to choose how I’ll respond and how I’ll let my response shape the next hours. Sometimes I’m better at making good choices than others. The great thing? If I don’t like the “color” I’ve chosen, I can choose a different color and repaint the walls, much as I had to do this week in the form of an apology to my son when I didn’t react well to his grumpiness. Those are the moments that become object lessons for us both as I model asking for forgiveness, he extends it and we move on choosing joy and transforming our days.

Sometimes we’re faced with much larger life decisions. Should we move? Should we change jobs? Which college is best for our child to attend? Should we take a particular risk and step off a ledge without knowing if there’s a net below? In those moments, we can sense the paralysis caused by the fear of making the wrong decision, especially if there’s more than one good option for us to consider.

Years ago, we heard a message that was life changing for us. In it, the pastor talked about this very issue of having more than one good choice set before us when making a major decision. We create our lists of pros and cons and all the while we’re trying to think ahead as we wonder what would happen if we make one decision over the other. How will that affect the rest of our lives? This pastor said we become so focused on discovering which one is the BEST decision when God is offering us the opportunity to choose between more than one great option. He’s allowing us to exercise our free will and choose, knowing that either one will have His blessing on it. That was incredibly freeing to us because we no longer focused on “what if we make a mistake,” but instead focused on “which would we like to do?” That opened up an entirely new world to us – one in which we partnered with God to determine His options, then enjoyed His delight in us choosing which of these great options we’d like to do, trusting in Him that the outcome would be good because His blessing was on it.

We don’t always get to repaint right away when we make a poor color choice. Sometimes, we have to live with our choices and suffer the consequences of being surrounded by a color we don’t like very much. Those are the times when we have an opportunity to learn how to make better choices next time. We learn  how to spend the time and pay the cost of trying some samples out on the walls before making a final decision, rather than acting impulsively in order be done with the task and move on to the next thing.

We also learn how to listen to the ideas offered by our Master Designer who often presents us with more than one design option knowing we’ll love whichever we choose.  

So, which will you choose? Will it be a shade of blue, yellow, grey, teal, green or red? Whichever it is, listen to the voice of your Designer, try out your samples to see which you like best and make your decision.

Soul Restoration

“Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, even as your soul prospers.”  (3 John 2)

This morning, I began to listen to Beni Johnson share a recent message in which she started with the above verse.  The latter half of it struck me – “…even as your soul prospers,” and it stayed with me. Our souls comprise our mind, will, and emotions. As I let this verse rest deeply in my heart, I began to realize anew that the changes that have been occurring in every area of my health and the ways that God has been opening doors for Brian and me recently have come directly out of our souls prospering as God has been restoring them within us.

When we were born, we were innocent, unmarred by sin – that of our own or that of others against us. However, over time, our souls become beaten up by the storms of life, including storms of our own making. We become marred, tattered, broken. We forget that we have positions as sons and daughters of the King; that we’re dearly beloved and we’ll one day walk with Him on streets of gold.

I began to think about the treasures I’ve found in garage sales. They were once beautiful and wanted, maybe even kept in a place of honor in the person’s home. Over time, they were used, banged up, and became worn. Now, they’ve been set aside, forgotten, deemed as useless or unneeded. How often do we feel that way about ourselves?

Yet, I’ve laid hold of these “finds” with delight, knowing what they can become with just a little bit of restorative effort. After the work has been completed, I’ve displayed them proudly, used them with joy, and made sure that they were kept in good condition. If I look at that piece that I love and notice that something has become broken, I take the time to fix it again, bringing additional restoration where needed.

Psalm 23:3 begins with, “He restores my soul…” The word “restore” means to repair or renovate so as to return it to its original condition” or to “return (someone or something) to a former condition, place or position.” 

A former condition…place…or position…

He sees us in our broken condition and as Someone with an eye for beauty beneath the surface, He chooses us, lifting us out of the pile of worthless rubble we toss ourselves into. He smiles, knowing what we will become as we are restored, brought back to our original condition, made new. He returns us to our positions as sons and daughters as we walk with Him in the place of His presence. He continues to delight in us simply being with Him, caring for us daily, mending new areas as needed and He does it all with such great love for us, deeply desiring that we would prosper in all things and be in health in every way.

It all begins with our souls. 

Mercy Triumphs Over Judgment

Over the last four months, God has been accomplishing a lot of renovation within my soul and spirit. He’s been knocking down walls, breaking open vaults filled with things I’d locked away, and opening passageways to hidden rooms within my heart that were meant to be filled with love instead of darkness. I’ve experienced anger and pain as I’ve worked through issues of abandonment, rejection, and even betrayal. My Father has lovingly ripped areas of my heart down to the studs so that it could be rebuilt with beauty and mercy.

Recently, this theme of mercy has been like a revolving door, coming round and round again, within my mind and filling my soul. The lyrics to Amanda Cook’s song, “Mercy,” have captivated me entirely.

My past embraced

My sin forgiven

I'm blameless in Your sight

My history rewritten

Cause You delight in showing mercy

And mercy triumphs over judgment

Oh Love, great Love

Fear cannot be found in You

And there will never be a day

You're uncertain of the ones you choose

So I will awake

And spend my days

Loving the One who has raised me up

From death to life

From wrong to right

You're making all things beautiful

As I worshipped to this song this morning, the thought came to me, “What IS mercy exactly?” I found that the meanings include “unfailing love, kindness, tenderness, and an outward expression of mercy.” To have mercy means to have an “active desire to remove distress, to show compassion, pity, and love.”

This is what Father God has done for me – shown me unfailing love, kindness, and tenderness and He has removed my distress. In the words of the song, my past has been embraced, my sin forgiven, I’m blameless before Him and my history has been rewritten.

Mercy is also what He delights in me showing to others – doing what I can to remove others’ distress, showing compassion, pity and love. It’s in that place that forgiveness can flow, just as it did when Jesus hung on the cross and said with all the love in His heart, “Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do.” (Luke 23:34)

Honestly, the idea of showing pity creates a struggle within me because I immediately think that pity is not what I would want another to have toward me; however, when I look at its meaning, I’m better able to embrace it. Pity defined is the feeling of sorrow and compassion caused by the suffering and misfortunes of others. I can instantly feel that way for others and often do when those whom I love are suffering. I’ve just never thought of it as pity before.  

As for others showing it toward me? Those who know me well know what I have been walking through and I know they’ve felt measures of sorrow and compassion for what I was suffering. Yet, they’ve also seen God holding me tightly in His embrace. They’ve seen His peace and grace enveloping me and protecting me as if I were surrounded by an impenetrable bubble. There is no pity in that – only sweet smiles of joy at the realization of His mercy bringing me healing and freedom.

I mentioned to Brian this morning that what was on my heart to write today really wasn’t connected in any way to a house. I couldn’t figure out a way to draw from a specific house-related theme and connect it to mercy. Bri immediately answered, “Houses have to be decorated. Why not decorate them with mercy?”

Why not? Mercy triumphs over judgment and our Decorator makes all things beautiful.

 *Definitions for “Mercy” taken from the Spirit Filled Life Bible, Nelson Publishing.

** Bethel Worship Live with Stephanie Gretzinger: "Mercy" & "The More I Seek You"

Letting Go

I’m a hoader – of sorts. I don’t fill our house to overflowing and the things I save aren’t useless pieces of junk. They’re things that have meaning. As our children have grown up, I’ve been saving anything and everything that I was certain they would want to treasure and smile at as they had their own families – like every piece of school work they brought home, including every piece of work we completed during the years that I homeschooled them. I always planned on creating separate boxes for each child and separating everything by year, but since we have four kids close together in age, I was lucky to have one box per year that I tossed everything into as it came home! I know they’ll love me for it someday…

I also still have every note I passed during certain years of school. I thought it would be really important for me to be able to go back and read those as my kids were reaching that particular age. It would help me remember what it was like to be a 7^th grader or a freshman or other ages. I imagined myself sitting with my daughter someday, reading through the notes, laughing about how silly they seemed, while talking through how important that drama was at that time in my life and relating it to what she was going through right then. It was a beautiful picture in my mind…and one never acted upon in real life. In spite of that, those notes sit in a box somewhere with all of the other boxes we’ve stored in the basement because I’m still hanging onto them, unable to let them go.

Our lives can often be a picture of that, can’t they?  There are so many things we hang onto, believing we’ll want or need them someday and while they may not be kept in literal storage rooms, we tuck things away in our minds, preserving them and keeping them more fresh than any box ever could.

Minds are incredible things. It’s amazing to me to realize how much I’ve held onto and yet how much I’ve completely forgotten. I’ve blocked out whole portions of my growing up years because they were hard and I believe that my mind has protected me from remembering every little detail because of the pain it would bring.

Still, some of those things replay over and over in my mind as if I’ve put the film on repeated loop. You know what that’s like, right? Those are things that have been stored away for safekeeping that we then take out every now and again, view in our mind’s eye, memorize every detail (again) and sink into experiencing it over and over. When the memory is a good one, that can be a wonderful experience. When it’s painful, it’s something else entirely.

Sometimes, we’re completely blindsided by a memory that we’ve packed up and placed in a vault with higher security measures than would be found at Fort Knox. It has remained in that place, likened by some to an enclosed time capsule, completely untouched for years. When it’s dug up and unlocked, it can be as fresh and new as if it had just happened and the associated feelings can be almost unbearable.

At times, those things can be blown open, set off by a trigger device that we thought we’d kept out of reach. Then we’re left shell shocked by the breach of that which we thought had been securely locked away.

I believe that at other times and in God’s perfect timing, the Holy Spirit gently and kindly unlocks things within us that we’ve kept hidden away, and even forgotten about, because God wants us to experience the freedom found in letting those things go. He has the master set of keys to every lock and knows the combination to any safe ever created. Nothing is hidden from Him. He knows where we’ve buried it and out of His abundant love, He uncovers it, brings it out and offers us an invitation to be rid of it.

The hard part for us can be the letting go. Even in the most practical of terms, when we clean things out in our homes, it can feel painful to let go of things not needed or used because we have an attachment to them. It’s much the same way in letting go of the unseen things - we have an attachment to those things for any number of reasons. Maybe it’s due to shame. Maybe it’s because we’re protecting others. Maybe it’s due to fear of what others might think if they see our junk out at the curb. Maybe it’s simply due to the fact that we’re comfortable with it being where it is and it’s going to take too much effort to get rid of it.

Those things that we hang onto create clutter and eventually leave very little room for the things that we want to hold onto. Like items that are perishable, some things begin to rot, stink, and even decay the things nearest to them. Other things are held onto for so long that the boxes they’re held in begin to break down, toppling over and spilling out everything onto whatever is around them.

We need to let go of the things that we don’t need – things that bring us pain and warp our image of ourselves. Those things need to be removed so that they no longer clutter our thoughts and become such weighty burdens that they’re too heavy or too big to lug around. We don’t need them. They aren’t treasures and there’s no good value in them, even in the eyes of others.

The best way to unlock the vaults and unload the boxes is through the power of forgiveness offered to yourself and to others. While it’s not my intention to make light of it because it’s not a simple matter, it’s easier than you would think. Put simply, Jesus died on the cross on our behalf so that we might be forgiven when we had done nothing to earn that forgiveness. If He did that for us, who are we to not forgive ourselves or others?

It’s time to clean house. Use the power of forgiveness to loosen your grip and make the choice to let go.

You don’t need that stuff anyway.

Monsters Under the Bed

Remember when you were little, you’d been tucked into bed, the lights were out…and you were SURE something was hiding under the bed? You could hear it breathing, were sure it was drooling, and you KNEW that it had its fangs bared, ready to gobble you up. You could hardly breathe and were too scared to cry out. You definitely weren’t going to put your feet on the floor to run out the door because that assured you would instantly be grabbed and dragged under the bed to certain death.

You tried to talk yourself out of it – tell yourself it wasn’t real…but imagination is powerful, paralyzing. Eventually, you’d manage to squeak out a call to your parents or babysitter. They would come in, discover your terror, turn the lights on and show you the truth – no monsters were hiding under your bed. They’d calm your fears, tuck you back in and say goodnight again, this time leaving the door cracked and the hall light on to let the light dispel the darkness. With light shining in, you weren’t afraid. Peace came over you and you could drift off to sleep knowing you were safe because monsters couldn’t hide in the light.

Even as adults, we’re still terrified of monsters – they simply come in a different form. No longer are they hiding under our beds, but inside our minds. Our minds can be dark places and darkness only breeds more darkness. Things look so different in the dark. An innocent shadow can appear to be a living source of imminent danger waiting for the opportune time to make its move; a sudden noise confirmation that it’s about to take place. Then, when we finally awaken in the morning and light floods the room, fear has left us and we realize just how silly we were the night before.

Because of our pasts, many of us have hidden monsters that no one else has seen or known about, but they speak their lies to our minds, paralyzing us with fear and leaving us unable to cry out for help.  We think that if others knew the truth, they would never see us the same again. They would reject or abandon us entirely because the truth makes us too ugly to love, so no one can know it. The monster of shame has come and torn us to shreds with its razor-sharp teeth.

Think about it, though. When you come into a dark room and turn on the light, it dispels the darkness and darkness can no longer fill that space. Did you know that God is personified as LIGHT?

• “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?” (Psalm 27:1a)
• “Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, ‘I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.’” (John 8:12)
• “This is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you, that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all.” (I John 1:5)

Did you know that He calls us out of darkness and into the light? “But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” (I Peter 2:9, emphasis mine)

Here’s the thing with God – we feel like we need to cry out for help because we’re trapped in darkness with monsters under the bed, but God is actually taking the initiative and proactively calling us out of it and into the light. We don’t have to ask for a rescue, He’s already there and He’s the light Who is able to dispel the darkness for good.

How I wish it were as easy as simply flipping on a light switch…Here’s the hardest part in my mind. We need to actually be willing to respond to His call, which means we need to allow His voice to become louder than the voices of the monsters telling us lies. Lies that would seek to isolate us from others, keep things hidden, cause us to live in shame and paralyze us from taking the first step to come out of the darkness and into the light.

That first step can be terrifying and can feel incredibly costly, as if you’re going to lose everything dear to you. It requires bravery and courage. Even though God is the embodiment of light and He’s calling you out of darkness, you may need to squeak out a cry for help and allow those who love you to come be God’s unconditional love in tangible form, turning on the light on for you and showing you that the light has chased away the monsters. Let those people surround you.

We also need to be willing to let go. There are some who simply shine a RAY of light into the darkness. They want to leave it, but choose stay in the shadows, held there by shame and guilt. They cling to the monsters, unwilling to let them go because they’re familiar to them. Even if they chase them away, they somehow miss them and invite them back. They want them to go, but they may not fully believe in the goodness and love that can be found in the light, that those would be enough to bring healing, acceptance and love, so they cling to that which they know. Somehow, that feels safer for them, without any risk or need to be courageous. They "need" their monster.

Recently, I’ve been allowing God to shine His light into darkness of my own, kicking out monsters that have lived under my bed for far too long. I can tell you that He IS able and through the pain, a depth of grace and peace has rested on me like I’ve never experienced before and I’ve discovered beauty within because of it. Truth has finally been able to illuminate my mind and there is freedom in my soul. I KNOW that I am a beloved daughter, adored by my Father, and I am reveling in the love that He’s pouring out on me. I delight Him and He has brought “my soul out of prison, that I may praise His name; the righteous have surrounded me, for He has dealt bountifully with me.” (Psalm 142:7, paraphrased)

My heart is that you, too, would be able to drive out and let go of the monsters under your bed, discovering the same freedom I’ve found. Be brave. Let His light shine into the darkness and if you need help, let me know. I’d love to surround you with His love. Trust me – monsters can’t hide in the light.

Work in Progress

I could never live in a house under construction. The mess, the people in and out, the delays, the number of decisions to make…I would completely lose it.

I like everything around me to be in its place, neat and tidy. Order brings peace to my world; a feeling that all is right and well in my life. It gives me a sense of protection, with my home being a strong fortress in which I can find refuge.

There are always the small things that need to be repaired, which are easy to handle. Even while doing minor repairs, we can still clean the house and put everything in order. Then we can invite people into our home and no one will see the leak under the bathroom sink…nor do they necessarily know that the inside frig doesn’t work very well, so we really use the one in the garage…or that under the poster on that bedroom door is actually a BIG hole.

While some things can’t be missed, like the driveway caving in or a garage door needing repair, guests have no idea what actually needs to be addressed in our home. We create it that way. We want others to see the very best, not the mess. But, we know. We live with it every day.

That’s pretty much a picture of our lives, isn’t it? We like things to be neat and tidy. We keep things patched up and glued together or even hidden so that it looks like everything is in great shape. If we put a fresh coat of paint on the walls or line them with wallpaper, we can cover up a whole lot of scars and imperfections. It gives us a feeling that everything is all right. We can still invite people in, because we’re able to hide our brokenness.

Yet, it’s all an illusion.

Bri will sometimes look at a bathroom renovation with a potential client and they’ll tell him that for now, they only want to replace the tile on the walls, not the shower base. Bri will show them how their shower base is already beginning to break down and within a short time, they’ll be forced to go ahead and replace the shower base, potentially causing damage to the new tile. Even worse, if they wait on the base, it WILL worsen and it may cause even greater issues that will require the shower having to be completely redone all over again. The clients’ goal is understandably to save money, but in the end, it will cost them so much more to not address it completely and fully from the start.

It’s the same in our lives. We ignore things that are broken within us. We cover it up, make it look pretty and go throughout our days acting like all is well. We like to focus on that which will cost us the least and try to get away with only renovating what we WANT to change.

We’d rather not make a mess of EVERYTHING. People would SEE that.  We couldn’t keep that hidden and it would get all over everything. Besides, a project like that would be a lot of work, it would be costly, and it would likely run over schedule. Who has time to have their life interrupted for that long?

Ask me to live in the midst of renovation? I don’t think so! Stuff would be in piles all around me and dust would cover everything. The constant banging and other construction noises would put me right over the edge. I would get totally over stimulated and “peopled out.” Trust me. It wouldn’t be pretty! Just do the repairs on what I’m willing to do for now and I’ll deal with the rest when it’s REALLY needed.

The problem? Renovation is inevitable. At some point, things will either become so bad that there’s no choice but to fix them or we’ll arrive at the place where we no longer want to live in past decades. Certain things need to be ripped out, let go of, and have the focus shifted to the present day. If we wait to deal with rotting areas, those will begin to affect the areas around them – relationships, work, health and so much more.

Eventually, we’ll be forced to gut everything and live in the mess – a mess we’ve now initiated and invited in. That’s exactly what’s needed to happen all along.

The idea of renovation can be scary. There are so many unknowns. What’s behind that wall? What will I find under the carpet? What if it’s a whole lot worse than what I’m expecting? What if things don’t turn out the way I’ve pictured it in my mind? What if there are delays and I’m stuck in this mess even longer? What if it ends up costing me way more than I had planned on paying?

Terrifying. Real. Paralyzing. Who wants all of that?

But if we wait, the brokenness within keeps getting worse and it begins to affect other things in our lives. As many have been quoted as saying, “Change happens when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of change.”

So, we give in. We welcome the Contractor and His construction crew. We work together with them and we allow them to make a mess in order to create something of greater beauty and function. We allow the work to continue, even past the time when we thought it would be complete. We know that in the midst of the project, we’re still safe and protected because now, our true refuge and fortress is being uncovered and it’s been worth the cost.

Whole. New. Beautiful. We want ALL of that. And, God will give us the grace we need during the process.

Grace to live in the daily mess.

Grace to have things be in process and not immediately completed.

Grace to be patient as the work is done.

Grace to find joy along the way.

Because we trust the One doing the work, it will turn out even better than we could have ever imagined.