Just Start

Just start. That phrase has been coming to mind a lot over the last few weeks. Typical for the beginning of a New Year, right? I read recently that it’s the “start” that usually stops most people. Whether it’s New Year’s resolutions, goals set for the year, exercising regularly, eating healthier, losing a few pounds, starting a project, writing a blog post (ahem)…we don’t get anywhere if we don’t start.

I’ve known friends who talk for months and even years about doing projects on their homes. They cut out pictures, pin color schemes and ideas on Pinterest, talk about it incessantly, and dream about it constantly. Days pass. They turn to weeks. Weeks become months and the next thing you know, another year has passed without that bathroom being redone, the kitchen being updated, the fire pit being built out in the yard…Who am I kidding? WE’VE done it.

Small projects somehow become insurmountable, even in their simplicity, and they don’t get done. In our house, that can end up in some pretty hefty frustration when projects aren’t completed, let alone started. Does that happen in your house or are we the only ones?

There always seems to be a valid reason why we don’t start particular projects – or at least we rationalize that the reasons are valid. There are so many things vying for our time and attention and bigger projects, like house renovations, REALLY disrupt life. That alone can be frightening. Do we really want to start on a project that will likely experience delays and end up costing more than we expected? Will I succeed in what I’m doing????

Ohhhh….that last question hit home – the paralyzing fear of failure…in ANY area of life…

Those questions ignite arguments in our minds. Those arguments? They lead to limiting beliefs. What are limiting beliefs? Type it into Google. You’ll get all kinds of answers including:

"Just by believing them, we do not think, do or say the things that they inhibit. And in doing so, we impoverish our lives. We may have beliefs about rights, duties, abilities, permissions and so on. Limiting beliefs are often about ourselves and our self-identity." *

Limiting beliefs are based on excuses, flawed logic, past experience, fears and more. They convince us that we’re less than who we are and so are our capabilities. Limiting beliefs paralyze us from getting started. Nowhere is this more true than when those limiting beliefs originate from fear – especially fear of failure.

What if I try to lose weight and I “can’t?” What if I do this house project and I hate what I choose? Can I trust myself to make the “right” decisions? What if I make a mistake? What if people see my failures? What will they think? What if they don’t like something as much as I do? Do I REALLY want to do this project or commit to reaching a particular goal if it may take longer than expected and cost more (of me) than I was willing to invest? Am I willing to risk failure???

What if there were no arguments? No questions? No limiting beliefs stopping you? What if you didn’t care what people thought and didn’t need their approval? What would you do? What would you start? What renovations would you begin in your life? What would you get back to doing that you'd set aside?

It takes courage to start, but you’ll never get anywhere without taking the first step.

It may already be the middle of the first month of the year, but it’s not too late. It’s NEVER too late. Who says you need the New Year to start something? My "just start" means getting back to blogging regularly. I'm done listening to the excuses and arguments and I'm starting again. 

Silence the arguments – those from within and those from without. Take a risk. JUST START. You’ll only get to where you want to be if you begin. 

Let's do it together. I'm taking that first step right alongside of you. What step are you taking? Post it in the comments so it becomes more real. That way, you're more likely to start. Here's to a great beginning!

* (http://changingminds.org/explanations/belief/limiting_beliefs.htm)

Living the Sabbath Rest

Everyone has been asking us if we've found a new house to move into yet and my answer is still, "We haven't gotten the final word yet, but God's got this!"

I recently finished reading Genesis and felt prompted to start digging into Hebrews, the book of faith. This morning, I read chapter 3, which oddly enough happened to be all about houses at the start of the chapter, and then continued on into chapter 4, which talks a lot about entering into His rest and mentioned the Sabbath. After reading that chapter, I happened to check my FaceBook and had my memories from this day over the last several years show up in my notifications. Guess what was one of my memories from this day last year??? A post about me actually taking a Sabbath day of rest with my family.

God had my attention.

People haven't understood how we could wait patiently and not be freaking out about not having a solid answer on a house that we're hoping to move into in 4 days, but we know that God's got this. We don't have a Plan B. I know that sounds totally crazy, but God has confirmed in a really unique way that this is the house, so we're waiting on Him. We know that He'll make all the pieces fall into place and the timing will be perfect. If we've somehow missed it, then we've missed it and we'll cross that bridge if we get to it.

In the meantime, our plan is to hold steadfast to the end, believing in the One who built the house in the first place and we're giving Him all of the glory along the way (Heb. 3: 3-6, 14). We're determined to remain steadfast in our hearts and in doing so, we know that we'll enter His rest - the very opposite of the Israelites who wandered in the desert for 40 years and were denied entrance into the Promised Land, the land of rest, because their hearts were hardened, they tested and tried God, and they went astray in their hearts despite having seen God move miraculously in their midst (vs. 8-11). We've seen God move miraculously in so many ways and because of that, we have steadfast faith that He'll do it again.

We're planning on enjoying entering His rest because "we who have believed do enter that rest" (Heb. 4: 3).

Are you finding rest in Him? It's yours for the taking. Believe, have faith, hold steadfast in your confidence in Him to the end and enter His rest.

The Renovated Life: Arise Life Church

What an incredible honor and blessing it was to share a bit of our story and God's renovating work in our lives at Arise Life last night!

We're making the message available in two formats - a live video posted on our FaceBook page, as well as a link to the podcast. If you're on FaceBook, you should be able to access the video since we made it "public."

If you have trouble accessing the message in these formats, but would still like to listen, please get in touch and we'll do our best to help!

The Renovated Life FaceBook Live Video

Arise Life Podcast

Join Us This Saturday at Arise Life!

You've read our blog...if you'd like to hear us speak in person about living a Renovated Life, join us this Saturday, July 9th, at 6:00 p.m. at Arise Life Church, 2005 Stilesboro Rd., Kennesaw, GA. (Click on the address for a link to directions.)

We'd love to have you join us!

God's Got This

As I began reading the first verses in Genesis 16 this morning, I felt compelled to stop and journal. This is what I wrote.

“Lord, I understand Sarai well. She believed Your promise, but when that promise was delayed, she came up with a solution that she thought would bring Your promise to fruition. How often do I see or understand your plan, then come up with my own solution for seeing it fulfilled? The waiting can be so hard. I begin to second-guess myself and think that I should be doing more – taking more steps of faith, putting more into action. You are perfectly capable of fulfilling Your promises without my help. I know there’s a part for me to play – even Sarai had to be intimate with Abram for Isaac to be conceived, but You don’t need me to come up with my own way of bringing Your promises to pass. You keep telling me that You’ve got this, so I’m going to do what I’m supposed to do and let You do the rest.”

In so many ways, we’re waiting on Your promises to be fulfilled right now, but we’re not alone in this. So many others whom we know and love are in similar positions and, like us, they have huge life changes on the horizon. In the process of our lives being renovated, which sometimes includes being moved to an entirely new house and location, the uncertainty and the inability to see the end from the beginning can be incredibly disconcerting. What we do know is that You’ve given us promises and You have a solid track record of fulfilling those in our lives. So, we’ll continue to stand on the words that keep echoing through our minds, “God’s got this.”

Worth the Investment

Marriage is hard.

You live with someone day in and day out. Their idiosyncrasies may or may not drive you crazy and it's easy to get so wrapped up in the day-to-day that you can pause and suddenly realize your spouse has become your roommate, not your best friend and lover. What about the baggage you brought into your marriage and let's not forget the unexpected turns of events - the business failures, illnesses, the "life didn't turn out the way I thought it would" events and even tragedies? Yah, none of that is easy.

Brian and I were watching a Hallmark movie last night (yes, we do that and Bri actually enjoys them). It was Karen Kingsbury’s “A Time to Dance.” A couple married for over 20 years was about to divorce when they discovered that their daughter was engaged and they decided to hide their decision until after her wedding. At one point in the movie, the father-in-law was speaking to his son-in-law and explained him that a marriage is like a house that’s been invested in – you don’t just throw away the investment. You take care of it, make the repairs, and treat it like the investment that it is. (Sound familiar? Renovated Life, anyone???)

It’s funny the things that will spark conversation. Bri and I talked for a while after that movie, reflecting on the countless times that we’ve purposely CHOSEN one another, even telling the other one, “I choose YOU.” I’ve struggled at times with feeling like I wasn’t “enough” for Bri – not the right shape or size, not giving enough of myself often enough intimately, not being adventurous enough, or supportive enough of his dreams…He could say the same of himself toward me as far as not feeling like he’s been “enough,” but that’s his story to write and not mine.

We have an amazing marriage and we don’t ever take it for granted. We know ours isn’t the “norm” – it’s unique, it’s us and it’s been hard fought for and hard won. It’s a choice we make every day. We choose not to settle for less. We choose to work through the frustrations. We choose to be angry, but not tear the other person down in the process. We’ve never called one another a derogatory name – EVER. We choose to believe the best in the other person, knowing the heart above what we are seeing and hearing in the moment.

We live by 3 rules in marriage and those 3 rules have saved us time and again:

1. Jesus Christ is Lord of our lives (and our FIRST LOVE, above the other person).
2. Divorce is not an option (Oh, but I have such great compassion and empathy for those who have divorced. I looked at a church leader years ago and said, “I totally understand why people choose to get a divorce because it can seem a whole lot easier than what we’re going through right now.” I can tell you, however, that being on the other side of that rough time and having fought through it has made our marriage so very sweet…)
3. When angry, deal with the issue, don’t assassinate the other person’s character (i.e. no name calling).

 Some people get angry with us for the things we share publicly about one another. It’s “TMI” in their opinion and spoken of too often. That’s ok. Each person is entitled to their opinion and it’s not going to change anything for us. I’m here to tell you that while what we have in our relationship is rare and beautiful, it’s something that ANYONE can have. How badly do you want it? What are you doing to care for your investment? Are you making the repairs? Are you taking care of it? Are you putting the other person before yourself? Are you communicating even when it’s hard, facing challenges with love and offering grace in areas where you’re each missing it? Are you forgiving even when you feel you have every right to hold something against your spouse? (***)

What do you want in your marriage? What kind of a vision do you have for it? What have you dreamed your marriage would be like? When is the last time you saw your marriage being able to be like that or a “Jesus refined” version of it (since we can sometimes get a bit selfishly off track in our dreams)? Can you believe that He can redeem it and make it even better than what you’ve imagined or hoped for? Are you willing to put in the work…make the sacrifices…lay down your life for one another? Do you really want it and can you commit to walking it out EVERY. SINGLE. DAY?

It’s work. Think of the homes that have good bones, but need to be totally gutted and redone to make them beautiful and inhabitable again. Those homes can sometimes be purchased for as little as a dollar, but when the work is completed, they’re worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in return. Yes, a cost is paid to get them in that condition, but their value exceeds the cost spent, giving it a good ROI – return on investment, and making it well worth the frustrations, obstacles, unexpected expenses and even the delays in completion.

In the end, it’s beautiful and priceless, a treasure for the two of you and for the generations that follow in your family line. What an inheritance to pass on to your children, grandchildren, great grandchildren…and it can all begin with you.

My love, I choose YOU. 

  

(***Side note – we fully believe that there are situations and circumstances in which for the health, safety, and well-being of a spouse or children in the home that separation and even divorce needs to happen. We don’t believe that marriage should be maintained at the price of abuse. That being said, we do believe that God is the God of the impossible and He is a redemptive God. Use wisdom.)

Vantage Point

When I think about building a house, one of the first things that comes to my mind is the view. How will the house be positioned and what will I see out of each window in the house? I want to position it to make the most of its vantage point, affording me the best view possible no matter where I am in the home.

I’ve been thinking about vantage points in terms of people recently. God keeps drawing me to have a deeper understanding of His vantage point when He looks at people. Vantage point literally means, “a place or position affording a good view of something.” His view is so much different from mine. He sees us with such deep love. He looks past our flaws and He sees us as we were created to be, according to His original design for us. Through His unconditional love, He draws that original plan out from within us, bringing us into the fullness of our unique design. We have a choice to respond or not, remaining the same or allowing that love to change our hearts, transforming us from the inside out.

When I look at others, do I see a “good view” of them? Can I look past that which is unlovely in them? Can I look past it in myself?

Jesus hung out with sinners, tax collectors, and prostitutes. It was on these men and women that the church was built, but today, how many of us shun those we’ve determined to be sinners, especially when it comes to building the church? When is the last time any of us have loved the “objectionable” individuals in our midst. Can we see a leader within them? Can we look at an addict and see redemptively into their lives and souls, look beyond their current circumstances and see the greatness of His testimony within  them waiting to be drawn out? How is our house positioned? What do we see out of each window?

We’re called to love – even those…ESPECIALLY those…who don’t deserve it. The homeless, the addict, the prostitute, the pimp, the adulterer, the thief. Think of it… with one of His final breaths, Jesus loved the thief hanging beside Him and assured him of his place with Jesus in eternity.

Do we have that vantage point? I’m not there yet, but I’m working on it.